It doesn’t matter what cute references I could make, my heart only wants one thing: Lard Lad Doughnuts. So I was a kid when The Simpsons came to the BBC. It may have been the biggest cultural event of my childhood. And we’ll say nothing of the varying quality over the years. My heart is with those early episodes.

That picture is from when I was 22 when they’d just opened the Simpsons Ride in Universal Orlando. I was significantly more adorable then I know. Also I miss having that tunic. The next time we went I was 30 and in the intervening eight years an entire Springfield had been built around it. I was only a vegetarian back then so I was able to eat a Krusty Burger, drink a Flaming Moe and eat a Lard Lad Doughnut.

Okay so the doughnut is huge. Like plate sized and me and Kelsie took about two days between us to eat it. It wasn’t great and now they have voodoo doughnuts it’s not anything I’d bother with again even if they went vegan.

That’s my childhood cartoon and adult holiday obsession sorted. On with the vegan food! I went for a baked doughnut, because I’m not to be trusted with hot oil, so I made the ones from Chloe’s Kitchen, dyed pink and covered in sprinkles.  Much smaller but also taste better.

I don’t really have to think about this one because who hasn’t hung out close to the dark side once or twice? You know those days when you just can’t stand one more person and every little thing is driving you crazy.

When I first moved down here I informed Kate that when I was in one of those sort of moods she should give me pizza and sit me on front of Gilmore Girls. Things have changed a little in ten years and now it’s the three bs: blankets, binge watching and Bombay Express. Channa masala, dhal, and potato curry.

So the development stages of this post were as follows:

Day one: fail to come up with any puns at all.

Day two: finally come up with pun but fail to think of like a single song lyric, title, or artist I like.

Day three: brain still refuses to put together a pun and a song. Kate suggests just taking a picture of a Greggs sausage roll. I refuse and instead bake a Blondie. Because I’m not making an Oasis reference and you can’t make me.

This is the Raspberry-Chocolate Chip Blondie from Vegan With A Vengeance.