Oh my god why?! So today I planned to go down to the beach and cook because that’s our new Sunday summer tradition. However the last two Sundays it’s been raining. Which is the constant summer tradition. Today is a bit of a fail then. Here I am eating a vegan magnum in the rain.

Hot chocolate is the perfect end to a winter’s day. Or indeed, any other day throughout the year, which is why Clare and I have 36 cartons of oat milk in the pantry. It was hot chocolate at the Exploding Bakery in Exeter that introduced us to oat milk (first Oatly, and then Minor Figures), and having tried every vegan milk around we’re still convinced that oat milk makes the creamiest hot chocolate.

This is my hot chocolate recipe: a grown-up hot chocolate, dark and strong.

Ingredients (serves 2)

1 tbsp sugar
2 tbsp raw cocoa powder (if using processed cocoa powder, increase the sugar to 2 tbsp)
15g dark chocolate (I use three squares of Green & Blacks 70%)
400ml (2 mugs) oat milk (I use Minor Figures)

Method

Put everything in a saucepan over a high heat and whisk steadily until the chocolate melts. Pour into mugs.

 

It’s more of a marathon than a sprint. Kate is halfway through Jane the Virgin and as it’s been quite traumatic I made her some of her favourite cheesy snacks. These are the goldfish crackers from Chloe Flavour only we make them star, heart and baby bear shape because I don’t have a mini fish cutters. If you’ve never made these get on it because they are super delicious.

It doesn’t matter what cute references I could make, my heart only wants one thing: Lard Lad Doughnuts. So I was a kid when The Simpsons came to the BBC. It may have been the biggest cultural event of my childhood. And we’ll say nothing of the varying quality over the years. My heart is with those early episodes.

That picture is from when I was 22 when they’d just opened the Simpsons Ride in Universal Orlando. I was significantly more adorable then I know. Also I miss having that tunic. The next time we went I was 30 and in the intervening eight years an entire Springfield had been built around it. I was only a vegetarian back then so I was able to eat a Krusty Burger, drink a Flaming Moe and eat a Lard Lad Doughnut.

Okay so the doughnut is huge. Like plate sized and me and Kelsie took about two days between us to eat it. It wasn’t great and now they have voodoo doughnuts it’s not anything I’d bother with again even if they went vegan.

That’s my childhood cartoon and adult holiday obsession sorted. On with the vegan food! I went for a baked doughnut, because I’m not to be trusted with hot oil, so I made the ones from Chloe’s Kitchen, dyed pink and covered in sprinkles.  Much smaller but also taste better.